when the government fails, i make shoes

by tobias crabtree

window

i find little comfort in the ones who call me “their’s”.

i’m no one’s.

i’ll carry my own heart, thank you very much, carry it to the grave. what you gonna do mr. gov’t, tax me? don’t misread me, i am not an anarchist, nor am i a nihilist (although i have an affinity for them in “the big lebowski”), i’m just a dude. yeah, yeah, i served my country but that doesn’t make me a believer in what we have here. what do you call it when you can’t tell if anything is being changed by the ones who think they are changing things? so many people, believe in their party, and for what? is there any real connection between those throat-clearing lackey’s in congress and the poor boy on the corner? i have an answer for ya. you know what it is. now don’t get all mad at me just because i don’t trust them good ol’ boys in washington. we don’t have to agree here, and i’d probably fight for anyone’s freedom, no matter where they were from or which color they wave over their head. i believe in freedom…period. 

it all boils down to this. look to your fellow humans, the ones on the ground level. increase your freedom by knowing how to grow your own food. know how to look the softies in the eye and say, “no thanks, i don’t want what you have.” a dependence upon someone who not only doesn’t understand your condition, but doesn’t want to understand it, will not make you strong. and if the government doesn’t work out, would we just sit and wait to die? when do you think the last time one of them fellas in congress had an introspective moment because he was laying on the earth and looking up at the stars with a truly open heart?

yeah, right.  whenever i’ve genuinely needed help, it’s been family and friends who’ve come through. i believe in my tribe.

well, there’s jobs to do there in washington. there sure are, but they love to spend there time reminding everyone in the room how important they are while they sit around in their thousand dollar suits and use big words to say absolutely nothing that will change a damn thing. hey, if i’m wrong, show me how? call up the congressman that you love so much and let’s sit down and have an intelligent conversation. go ahead, let’s see if they have time to talk with this poor boy about veteran affairs or health or insurance. you might spend your life on the phone and never talk to any of them, let alone one of them that has a heart for people.

so what will we do? well, i can tell ya what i did today when i heard that things went bad in washington…i made some shoes.

i picked up a ball of clay and made a space ship, rather, what i think one might look like.

i walked a trail in the woods and drank a coffee.

i wrote gustavo who is pedaling his bicycle through spain.

i ate 4 plumbs from the yard and a pear that i found under a tree down the road.

i looked at my computer and wrote some sarcastic things to a few people who i knew would respond in kind.

i thought of my ma, who is quite amazing and would probably make a damn good president, although my mother really does keep her word, and i don’t think you can be a president and do that.

i told a couple friends that i loved them and believed in them.

i took some pictures of some flowers and a red leaf and a green leaf.

i listened to towns van zandt sing a few sad songs.

i drank a little rye whiskey out of a tin cup in honor of greg brown and hunter dahlberg.

i looked at myself in the mirror and then stopped before i got depressed.

i glued the crack in my heal with crazy glue ( i know it’s bad, i do it because it works, ok?)

i thought of a mean trick i could play on tim garrison even though he’s helped me a ton lately.

i petted the dogs and cats and even a goat (not one of the bucks…they’re way too horny right now).

i looked at a little yellow warbler and his girlfriend on the sunflower stalks outside my shack.

i sang que sera sera to myself.

that’s about it. but hey, there’s lots to do, with or without those important folks who will, i’m sure, figure out some way to stay in charge of everything.

and last but not least, don’t forget that all opinions are just polished garbage…especially mine.